It Is For Your Own Good!

Bible Book: Exodus  20 : 14
Subject: Sex; Immorality; Adultery; Marriage
Series: Ten Commandments - God's Way, The Right Way

It Is For Your Own Good - Commandment 7

Dr. J. Mike Minnix, Editor,

Exodus 20:14

Our nation has gone through a revolution in the last fifty to seventy years. A revolution is a radical change in opinion and action resulting in a different way of looking at life and a different way of living. For example, the American Revolution pulled down the idea of the rights of kings and replaced it with a democratic republic. An experiment that had been attempted in small, incremental ways previously, was suddenly in full bloom in this country about 225 years ago. The world was changed for the good by this revolution. On the other hand, the Bolshevik Revolution in 1917 led to the establishment of the horrible and sorrowful Communist Government in Russia. Millions of people were tortured and killed. Property was seized. Millions were sent to Siberian prisons. Until the fall of the wall in East Berlin, this revolution wreaked havoc across Europe and much of the world. So, a revolution can be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on the purpose and the results.

America began to experience a revolution in the 1950s, which has brought much sorrow and pain to our nation. It is called the Sexual Revolution. It began largely with the efforts of Hugh Hefner, founder of the Playboy empire. Hefner held the belief that sex was like eating and sleeping. He stated that it was a natural animal desire, which should be enjoyed when and where a man and woman of like mind thought it best. His theory was promoted for several years until it found license and freedom in the Flower Child generation of the 1960s. Free love, free drugs and rock music fueled a bonfire, which Hefner had first kindled.

What is the result of the Sexual Revolution? Our divorce rate has sky-rocketed to levels undreamed of before the 1950s. The problems this has caused the children of our generation cannot be fully measured. Teen pregnancy rates reached epidemic rates very quickly. Abortion followed naturally in the wake of this revolution. Venereal disease increased rapidly. New strains of the disease were soon evident and scientist were warning that the danger of incurable strains were on the horizons. Enter stage left: Aids - Auto-immune-deficiency syndrome. This disease has ravaged our landscape.

In fact, we now see couples living together for months and years before marrying, if they marry at all. I talked to someone the other day who told me about a couple that lived together for three years and finally had a beautiful wedding - one year later they divorced. What is going on in our society when sex is frivolous, marriage is postponed and divorce is not seen as harmful? All of this is the result of turning our back on God, and the results have not been good. Believe me, they are going to become worse!

Add to these problems the increase in sex related crimes. Rape, incest, molestation, and child pornography cases have clogged the police work sheets and courtrooms of America. Child abuse, leaving newly born babies in trash cans, dead-beat dads (and even dead beat moms), and other problems have become something we hear about constantly. Unless we change, it is going to get worse!

One need only think upon this litany of horrors to realize that sex is powerful and dangerous. When God gives instructions for sexual behavior, He is not doing so because He is seeking to keep us from some hidden delight, He is doing so to keep us from a thousand hidden dangers.

Ladies and gentlemen, let me add to this that one of the biggest lies Satan has ever expressed is that sex outside of marriage is an innocent past time, and that it hurts no one. You have listened to the litany of sorrows it has brought on our world, and I have only skimmed the surface of the damage done by this Mount Everest sized problem in our society. I want us to look at this issue today and discover God's will and way for the sexual human creatures He created.

I. The Divine Creation Of Human Sexuality

God made us and he made us as sexual creatures. What was His purpose in creating us with this particular human impulse, desire or craving?

A. For Procreation

It stands to reason that God intended for sex to include procreation. He told Adam and Eve to go forth and populate the earth. From the looks of world population, that is one command that Adam and Eve succeeded at obeying beyond their wildest imaginations! This is yet another reason why sex is serious business. Sex involves the possibility of the making of another human life. God created us to procreate. Any attempt to circumvent this process can result in failure. Many people practicing sexual freedom thought they were protected only to find out too late that a little one was on the way. For many this has led them to the sins which David committed when he had the same experience with Bathsheba so long ago: lying, manipulating and the eventual taking of another human life for the sake or personal convenience. Although David did not take the life of the baby, he did commit manslaughter against Bathsheba's husband.

Actually, one of God's intended blessings for a married couple was the joy of holding in their arms a precious child created as a result of their abiding love. God's design was for new life to occur as a result of the intimate love between a husband and wife.

B. For Pleasure

But God also created the joy of sex. Some picture God as this prudish, mean, old man who doesn't want anyone having any fun. People often portray Christians as people looking for anyone enjoying themselves at anything so they can find a way to stop it instantly. Nothing could be further from the truth. God made you as a sexual being. He intended for sex to be a pleasure known in marriage between a husband and a wife. Like everything in creation, when the pleasure is sought outside the design plan of the manufacturer, hardship, pain and suffering will someday follow.

When God created Adam, he saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone. God made an equal partner to be with Adam. When Adam awoke from sleep, he saw Eve before him. The Scripture says that Adam exclaimed, "This is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh." The equivalent translation for what Adam said when he first saw Eve is, "Wow, just what I've been looking for."

Sex is not a dirty word! God meant for sex to bring pleasure. But He also stated that this special creation was to be kept in its proper place.

C. For Partnership

God made Adam and Eve to be partners. He made man and woman to be partners together in marriage and life. Adam and Eve were made to compliment one another. They were different in duties but equal in status. The partnership was to involve more than just sex, much more. The couple would join their lives together. They were meant to pray together, worship together, laugh together, cry together, and go down the roadway of life sharing the joys and pains of life as partners.

Since God created us and made us sexual beings, you would think we would turn to Him for instruction on this subject. Actually, most of our information and influence on sexual matters comes from pop culture. Movies, songs, TV programs, magazines, etc., shape the thinking of our modern society. This is very dangerous for a specific reason. A study was reported in Newsweek Magazine recently. Now, please understand, Newsweek is not a friend of Christians or conservative values, yet even their report revealed some startling statistics regarding the way Hollywood thinks about sex. The study involved 104 leading television writers and executives and was conducted by the Center for Media and Public Affairs, and the study found that Hollywood's views run far from the mainstream of public opinion. Some examples: Though 85 percent of Americans believe adultery is wrong, only 49 percent of TV writers and executives believe that it is wrong. Take abortion as another example: 59% of the American people believe that a woman has a right to an abortion on demand. Guess what the percentage is when it the same question was put to the television writers and executives? The answer is 97% of them think it is right for a woman to have an abortion on demand! Why do the Hollywood types think the way they do. Well, the survey revealed why. Four percent of the American people claim to have no religious affiliation, but 45% percent of the TV writers and executives claim to have no religious affiliation at all! (Statistics from "Newsweek," 7/20/92, "To Verify," Leadership.) That was in 1992, it is likely worse today.

The problem in our day is that the pied-piper of the modern media is leading us into believing that our conservative views are outdated and out of sync with the majority of people around us. Nothing could be further from the truth. But as the media leads more and more people to accept their liberal, anti-God message on sex and moral issues, we are quickly moving toward a minority status in our society. God made us. He knows how dangerous sexual license is. We must come back to Him for instruction and inspiration on this issue of human sexuality.

II. The Damaging Conditions In Human Sexuality

A movie was produced a few years ago entitled, Fatal Attraction. It as about a man who attempted to have a sexual fling that he thought would be over in a weekend. It turned into a nightmare as the woman with whom he was involved was not about to let him go. She determined to pursue him and destroy him.

Immorality is like that. It contains death in its nature. God knew that and He has commanded us to stay away from this sin in order to protect us. The 7th Commandment is for our own good. Just what dangers are involved in breaking this Commandment?

A. It Can Damage your Body

In 1 Corinthians 6:18 we read that immorality, sexual sin, is a sin against your own body. Few sins will damage a person more physically, psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually than sexual sin. Listen to me carefully. You do not break God's Law, you are broken on His Law. Lord Byron, the worldly poet wrote,

"My life is in the yellow leaf,

The flowers and fruits of life are gone,

The worm, the canker, the grief,

Are mine alone."

B. It Can Damage your Home

The spouse, the children, the family as a whole is crushed by the weight of this sin. The pain, guilt, shame, hurt, and emptiness, which this sin creates, cannot be measured. It has been stated that many serial killers come from homes where sexual practices were outside God's will and Word. As a pastor I have seen this first hand. I don't have words to tell you the pain I have witnessed in the lives of those affected by the sin or immorality.

C. It Can Damage Your Church

When you sin sexually, you sin against your church, the pastor, the fellow members who are putting faith in you. The Scripture says that God judges those who defile the Temple of God, whose temple we are. Churches are crippled by this sin. As Samson was weakened and blinded by his sin with Delilah, so is the church when the servants of God yield to this temptation.

D. It Can Damage Your Nation

Proverbs 14:34 states, "Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin is a reproach to any people." A Harvard sociologist named Pitrim Sorokin wrote in a book entitled, "The American Sex Revolution," the following words: "No civilization, no empire, no nation, has survived obsession with sex and impurity. This disease is eating the heart out of America." He was right. He wrote that in 1956 and look where it has brought us. The breakdown in the home has caused us to see the incredible rise in murder in our cities, a record number of people in American prisons, the decline in our educational position in the world, and an opiod addiction that is rocking our entire country. America cannot continue on this path without facing the consequences of our actions.

E. It Can Damage the Cause of Your Lord

When David committed adultery, he confessed this way, "Against Thee, and Thee only have I sinned and done this evil in thy sight" (Psalm 51:4). Yes, this is a sin against our Lord, and it can and does damage His cause.

The Illinois Department of Natural Resources reports that more than 17,000 deer die each year after being struck by motorists on state highways. According to Paul Shelton, state wildlife director, the peak season for road kills are in late fall. Why? The bucks are in rut in November. "They're concentrating almost exclusively on reproductive activities, he said, and are a lot less wary than they normally would be." Deer aren't the only ones destroyed by preoccupation with sex. - (Greg Asimakoupoulos in Fresh Illustrations for Preaching & Teaching (Baker), from the editors of Leadership.)

III. The Designated Control Of Human Sexuality

God gave the command that we guard against sexual sin. Just how do we do that, especially in a world that so glorifies sexual activity? There are some specific steps we must take.

A. The Problem Of The Mind

Jesus stated clearly that adultery begins in the mind. The Scripture says that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he. You must start by guarding your mind.

There is a story of two Buddhist monks walking in a drenching thunderstorm. They came to a stream, and it was swollen out of its banks. A beautiful young Japanese woman in a kimono stood there wanting to get to the other side but was afraid of the currents. In characteristic Buddhist compassion, one of the monks said, "Can I help you?" The woman said, "I need to cross this stream." The monk picked her up, put her on his shoulder, carried her through the water, and put her down on the other side. He and his companion went on to the monastery. That night his companion said to him, "I have a bone to pick with you. As Buddhist monks, we have taken vows not to look on a woman, much less touch her body. Back there by the river you did both." The first monk said, "My brother, I put that woman down on the other side of the river. You're still carrying her in your mind." - (John Claypool, "The Future and Forgetting," Preaching Today, Tape No. 109.)

The most important way to guard you mind is with Scripture. Jesus defeated the devil with the Word of God. In fact, your mind is like a container. Only so much can occupy the space at the same time. When tempted, a person should find a ready word from the Lord to use as a shield and defense. This cannot be done if the mind is given to considering sinful sexual thoughts as acceptable. Now don't misunderstand. Temptation is not sin. In fact, temptation can be a blessing. Look at James 1:12, which reads, "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." The word trial is a word for being tempted.

Most importantly, I mean that you should guard against letting your mind dwell on any sexual temptation. Don't put your mind in the path of temptation. Stay away from temptation. Flee youthful lusts. Run for your life. Don't put yourself in situations where you know that you are going to have your mind assailed by temptation. Enough temptation will come to you of its own accord without you helping it out with your own foolishness.

Guard your mind! The problem of sexual sin is not a problem below the waist, it is a problem from the neck up. Do a check up from the neck up. Ask yourself if you have been watching, reading, thinking about or entertaining sexual sin. Have you been flirting, or accepting flirting from someone? Guard your mind! Guard your mind!

B. The Promise From The Master

How precious are the promises of God. Look at 1 Corinthians 10:13, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." There is a route of escape. Look for it. Take it! Quickly! Don't delay. Run for your life!

I know you have heard the story of the man who was trapped in a flood. A truck came by and told him to leave his house and flee to higher ground, but the man refused. Then he climbed up to the second floor and a boat came by. The man refused to leave. Finally the water got higher, and the man climbed up onto the roof of his house. A helicopter came along, but he told them to go away that he was going to save his home. Finally the water was up to his chin and he prayed, "Lord, save me." But, alas, he died. When he stood before the Lord, he asked, "Lord, why did you not save me? Why did you let me drown?" The Lord replied, "I sent a truck, a boat and a helicopter and I wasn't giving you more than 3 chances." Friend, God will provide a way of escape. Take it! Take it quickly!

In Hebrews 2:18 we read, "Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted." The Lord is able to help you. He has been tempted in every way, just like you, only He did not sin. He knows how to overcome. Stay near the Lord, near the Cross.

C. The Purity For The Mistakes

I mean by this, purity for the times when we fail in word or deed to be true to God in the matter of sexual morality. God can and will forgive. He forgave the woman taken in adultery. David found forgiveness from the Lord. God will forgive. Of course, forgiveness may not remove all the consequences of your sin. David's sin cost a four-fold penalty in his life and that of his family. But, still, he knew the peace of God's cleansing. Some here today need to know that cleansing.

First, you need to look at your heart and ask the question, Am I saved? Do I belong to the Lord? If not, today is the day of salvation. Come to Christ who loves you and will save you. That is why he came, that is why He died. If you are a Christian, perhaps during the message God has brought to your mind words, thoughts, or actions that you know are unacceptable to Him. Right now, this very moment, ask Him to forgive you. But do more than that. Repent! Turn from whatever you may have been doing and determine from this moment on to walk a new and holy path with the Lord.


When Jesus was on the earth, He looked at His culture and labeled it, "An adulterous and sinful generation" (Mark 8:38). That is certainly our generation as well. And yet, Jesus did not come to condemn but to save. He did not come to heap guilt on people, but to free them from guilt, shame and judgment. He would say to us today, as He did in the days of old, "Come now, let us reason together, though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow, though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool."

Now  I know that those who have committed such sin are not likely to come forward today and admit that sin in front of this congregation. In fact, admitting such sin to everyone is not necessary. However, you do need to talk to God about it right now - right here. Someone here today is on the verge of stepping into a situation that can ruin your life and the lives of your family members. Here - today - tell God about it. Make a commitment to flee that sin which does easily beset you!

Someone here today has committed this sin and you need to ask God to forgive you. You may or may not need to talk to a family member or someone about it. That is for you and God to decide, but I know you need to plead for God's forgiveness in your heart.

Still, there are others here who do not know Jesus as your Savior. I am speaking on one subject, but God is convicting you about accepting Jesus as your Savior. I have preached on tithing and seen people come forward to get saved. So, if the God of grace is calling you to accept His forgiveness and salvation today, come and meet me here at the front this morning. Let me ask, how many of you in this room walked forward in a worship service to accept Christ or confess Him as your Savior. Raise you hands. Look at that! You see, hundreds have raised their hands to reveal that they came to Christ just the way I'm asking you to accept Him today. So, now we will sing and now you may come to the Lord. Let us bow and pray. Every person here, confess sins of a sexual nature in your heart as I pray and then we will ask those seeking to come to Christ to respond.